Friday, 25 December 2009

the pensieve in my life

sometimes, i really wish i had a pensieve, you guys know what pensieve is?
harry potter freak (like me) must know it.

A Pensieve is a stone receptacle used to store and review memories. Covered in mystic runes, it contains memories that take physical form as a type of matter that is described as neither gas nor liquid. A witch or wizard can extract their own or another person’s memories, store them in the Pensieve, and review them later. It also relieves the mind when it becomes cluttered with information. Anyone can examine the memories in the Pensieve, which also allows viewers to fully immerse themselves in the memories stored within, much like a magical form of real world virtual reality.

so,why i wished so? because, i am really bad at keeping memories. especially long-period memories. i dont know if its kinda a bad habit or even diseases or whatever, but i do.
that's why i am never good at re-tell story systematically, if someone asks me to re-tell someone's story that i have heard i would really feel, confused, where to start, how to tell, what to tell.

no, no, i am not dyslexia but ,i just cant tell it systematically. im good at making conclusion of something but im never good at detail.
i think globally. i always missed the details. like, when i study, i just take a big conclusion of those subject, i understand it all. but when you ask me particularly of that subject, i will fail.
i always fail, that's why i never got a 100 scored in my exams. i've always missed a thing! a simple thing!

and, back to the topic, i wish i had a pensieve bcs im afraid that i will forget all my memories slowly. i hate when the survey/quizes i took, asked me about "when bla3" "when bla3" bcs i find it hard to answer! i forgot! the memories are somewhere inside my head but i cant found it.

im afraid that someday, i would forgot him. the all the things we said. all the things ive done. all the things people said to me. all the things i learned. so it would be very good if i had pensieve so i can keep you in my memories all the time!

speaking of you, im afraid too that i will forget you. yes, you. because you know, i realize a lot, that people changes. proven, when i saw my elementary school friend, or someone i haven't met since long time ago then suddenly they popped out in front of my eyes, and they were so different until i wasn't recognize them at all and something like that. yeah, i forgot.

so, if you find me in the next couple years maybe 5 or 10 or whatever, and you have changed a lot, and i dont know you, or even recognize you or notice you, please please say hi to me. bcs basically, im not a friendly person. i wont say hi to you first to you if im a bit hesitating you.
i wont say hi first if i feel like you wont expect my greeting.

and speaking of changing, i always wondering how do i look like in the next 5 years.
will i change better? or maybe i'll stay
maybe, i wont wear any glasses anymore
maybe i will have a very long hair or even very short one.
maybe i'll dye my hair into blue, black, purple or even red! (no i wont)
maybe, i'll wear full make up
maybe i'll stay simple
maybe i'll dressed up
maybe just maybe.

future is interesting yet scary huh?

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