Tuesday, 30 June 2009

everyone needs me.


"i dont need miracle.
i am miracle."

-m.

stupidity is slow suicide.


"eventually it'll break my heart even worse,
i'd still love you."

-m

"stop saying lol, the world isnt that funny, cupcakes."
-m.

Monday, 29 June 2009

le parole "ti amo" sono in ballo le mie labbra, ancora una volta, da sola, a piangere night.i sono per voi.

Thursday, 25 June 2009

abis nonton star trek.

hmmph, makin cinta gw sama luar angkasa.
makin pengen jadi astronot.
makin penasaran sama 'mereka'


dont you think this is one of the most breathtaking scenery ?? YES IT IS.
dont you ever think, there's something great out there ( i mean instead of this crowded earth)
outer space is so great and amazing. geez, how i want to be there, exploring and doing so much fun (i guess :P)

Wednesday, 24 June 2009

listen to the rain - evanescence


Listen to the Rain - Evanescence

i really suggest you to playfull this song
because this song is soo, hmm peacefully.
and it feels like you are in Church or you're going to heaven hahaha
this is so not evanescence i know, this song is written by Amy Lee, for her graduation school choir
love it.

Monday, 22 June 2009

menanggapi blog titi.

bukannya gw mau belain Malaysia atau gw ga cinta Indonesia atau apa.
ini cuma komen dr gw aja,

gw cm pgn ngmg ma lo orang semua yang ngerasa warga negara Indonesia.
"SUKURIN!!"

lo liat sekarang, budaya lo di ambil, diaku2in sama negara tetangga.
sekarang dah gni lo semua marah2 ma dia. dulu lo kemanain semua budaya2 itu.
lo ga nganggep kan? lo malah seakan2 cuek dan ga berusaha melestaikan.
lo kemanain batik? gara2 direbut malaysia aja lo semua langsung berlomba2 make batik seharian, marah2 ma mereka.

iya gw tau emang malaysia salah. senak jidat aja ngakuin hak milik negara kita.

tapi ini juga jadi pelajaran buat kita.
hargailah budaya kita sebelum diakui orang lain.
kayak sekarang, ga enak kan??

dulu aja. mana mau lo semua make batik, bela2in wayang, sama pulau2 di kalimantan itu (gw lupa namanya), dsb.

ini merupakan sebuah tamparan bagi kita, menurut gw.
jangan sampe deh kejadian lagi brg2 kita di curi lg sma ngr lain.
ga mau kan? mau lo lama2 indonesia lama2 punah???

gakan? so, dari sekarang, hargailah budaya kita.
ga usah malu deh. punya kita jg bgs2 kok.
buktinya mereka sampe maling gt. ya kan?? ;)

no offense yaa
yes yes.

Sunday, 21 June 2009

words in German

konnte Ihr sich entschuldigen, meine Wunde heilen?
wenn Ja, ich Ihren aplogize akzeptieren w├╝rde!!!

ich konnte nicht Sie hassen!! :(


Saturday, 20 June 2009

ghost bride + runway = cooool!



this is the coolest runway i have ever saw!!
go Caridee!! i love her and how she ripped Melrose's dress hahaha
oh, and of course, freakin' great pose at the end.
*Miss Jay!!*

Thursday, 18 June 2009

miss and missing.

i don't know what does "miss" really mean.
as i knew,"miss" means you really want to meet someone who you know being so faraway from you. and she/he used to be near with you.

but i don't know why, i miss someone who doesn't being faraway from me.

maybe i could say, i'm not miss him. but i am missing him.

Wednesday, 17 June 2009


Irina Lazareanu

Tuesday, 16 June 2009

pretending


did you think taht she's really happy?

Saturday, 13 June 2009

jam 2 pagi tadi. huahahahah
gara2 ga bisa tidur, tebak apa yang gw lakukan?

nyoret2 tembok gw.

rasanya kayak balik lagi ke masa kecil gw.
dulu, semuaa tembok kamar gw, gw gambar2in sampe kayak gada sisa gt.
kayak ga punya bk gambar haha

hmmm, speaking of childhood,
entah kenapa kok gw ngerasa ada yang hilang ya dari masa kecil gw.
tp gw ga tau itu apa.
hmmm
lo semua bisa inget kan apa yang lo mau apa yang lo pengenin bgt bgt waktu kecil?

gw, hmm gatau gw lupa. hahaha
dan gw berusaha mencari tahu, apa yang dlu gw pengenin bgt.
apa yang dlu bkn gw penasaran bgt2.

gw rasa semua anak kecil selalu tertarik sama trik2 sulap yang kayaknya wah bgt bagi mereka.
dlu gw ngga. buat gw itu semua ngebosenin.
gw ga pengen nonton sulap. tapi gw maunya gw yang ngelakuin trik2 itu!

dulu gw ga percaya sama santa claus, gw berusaha percaya tapi entah kenapa ga bisa.
buat gw santa claus ada tapi dia ga dateng ke indonesia hahhaha.

terus peri? hmm
bullshit. hahaha

but i do have fantasy.

terus dari kecil gw suka bertualang. entah sendiri entah bareng2
yang penting gw mau jalan2.
iya dari dulu gw ga bisa diem.

oh ya 1 lagi kebiasaan gw kecil,
suka manjat.
manjat teralis jendela, pager (in case gw plg kesorean dan akhirnya dikunci dari luar ma nyokap sbg hukuman) , manjat2 deh pokoknya.

gw kecil, ga suka tidur siang. tp skg suka bgt.
gw kecil suka main pura2 jadi power ranger dkk nya.
gw kecil suka ngeliatin mba gw mencet jerawat dan berharap gw punya jerawat. bodoh lu,ga!
gw kecil suka main sama anak cowo. dan gw benci sama tmn TK gw yang namanya Melisa dan kakanya. sumpah mereka sombong abis! tengil parah! masa mainan gw dibuang ke tong sampah!! babik! hoya, sama dewi. gw sebel ma dia.
untungnya temen gw ngebelain gw hahah

ohya, gw sempet nangisin ank orang wkt TK, gw colok matanya waktu di jemputan, ga sengaja si heheh, sengaja ga sengaja si, abis dia ngatain gw.
tapi abis ituu, antek2nya malah nyorakin gw!! dan dengan sok tegar, pas nyampe rumah, nangis lah gw hahahha
gw nangis gara2 antek2nya bilang gw bikin dia (gw lupa namanya) buta, ya takutlah gw!

(pst, saat saya tengah menulis blog ini, tiba2 nyokap bokap gw nyap nyap. kenapa? mereka menyadari coretan2 di tembok kamar gw hahaha pas ditanya alsennya gw cm nyengir, bilang bosen. yaudalhyaaa kamar2 gw si, suka2 gw dong ah)

terus apa lagi ya yang bisa gw inget dari masa kecil gw?
lupa bo. serius dah.
tuh kan, kenapa si ingatan gw ga bisa tahan lama.
i think i miss something, i dont know what.

hmmmm

PS : i dreamt of the black sheep last night and lomo. its weird but i love it. :')

Thursday, 11 June 2009

a year ago. exactly a year ago.

the first time.
and stories goes by.

till now.
and i don't know is it going to end or gonna continue or just paused for a while.

do you remember, buttercup?
yes i do, cupcakes.

tomorrow gonna be a big day.
tomorrow always gonna be a big day.

Wednesday, 10 June 2009

idk which one makes me wanna hear it over and over. is it because him, or the voice, or the lyrics. hmph.



:')

first cut is the deepest

yeah, this sucks.

you. good to my friend(s).

but you ARGH!

do you want to know why i don't want to look at you?

cause first i give you a glance then i couldn't stop staring at you.
and once i cant stop staring at you, i couldn't stop thinking about you.
and once i cant stop thinking about you, i couldn't stop loving you.
and once i cant stop loving you, i couldn't let you go.
and once i cant let you go, i couldn't, ever live without you.or even remove you from my head.

and the worst, i want it.

whatever you call me.
I'm just giving you too much.
without taking anything.

heart, i don't know where exactly you are.
where exactly are we.
or what are we?

heart, i cant feel you anymore.

heart, i hate being this melancholic cause this is so not me.
i hate being so pointless and seems so tough and strong even i am really not actually.

i hate to hold my tears.


heart, i miss you. badly.
i'm sorry if i wasted your time.

you too my dear.

i hate you
i hate you
i hate you
i love you, damn it.

anyway, life goes on.
i have to face it. i have to, like you said.
i'll do. i dont know how. dont tell me. you know nothing how to deal it.

just come back anytime you want, heart.

i am so sorry if my words seems so drama-queen. but seriously, i am not.

Thursday, 4 June 2009

a - z

A
- Available: yes
- Age: 17
- Annoyance: noisy ppl
- Animal: hamster. fox.

B

- Beer: go ahead!
- Birthday: Feb 21st
- Best Friends: them
- Body Part on opposite sex: no specification :)
- Best feeling in the world: sleeping. dreaming esp you got a best dream ever you cant get in real
- Blind or Deaf: Deaf.
- Best weather: after raining
- Been in Love: Yes.
- Been on stage?: Yes.
- Believe in Magic: yes
- Believe in God: kinda :)
- Believe in Santa: No.

C
- Candy: jelly beans
- Color: black white red green chocolate
- Chocolate/Vanilla: choco choco
- Chinese/Mexican: Mexican.
- Cake or pie: both :)
- Continent to visit: Europe.
- Cheese: Extra Sharp Cheddar. melted too :)

D
- Day or Night: night
- Dance in the rain?: No.
- Do the splits?: Noooooo

E
- Eggs: whites only
- Eyes: Black brown.
- Everyone’s got : evrything
- Ever failed a class?: no. and hope no.

F
- First thoughts waking up: time -.-
- Food: anything

G
- Greatest Fear: being ignore, under the sea
- Goals: make them proud
- Gum: yes
- Get along with your parents?: Yes.
- Good luck charm: No.

H
- Hair Color: Dark brown, almost black. a bit red sometimes
- Happy: lalalalala
- Holiday: christmas
- How do you want to die: in hug by my love <>I
- Ice Cream: choco chip mint
- Instrument: Can’t play, love to hear the flute and bass.

J
- Jewelry: dont like
- Job: many things

K
- Kids: dont have. like them pretty much.
- Kickboxing or karate: Kickboxing.

-Keep a journal?: hmm

L
- Longest Car Ride: forgot
- Love: simple. yes or no.
- Letter: m.
- Laughed so hard you cried: All the time.

M
- Milk flavour: Not really a fan. Chocolate if I have to choose.
- Movies: dont have fave yet
- Motion sickness: No.

N
- Number of Siblings: 3
- Number of Piercings: noooo
- Number: 23

O
- One wish: super power :D woohooooo

P
- Perfect Pizza: Cheese, meat, peperoni, cheese again. ah, large :9
- Pepsi/Coke: Coke.

Q
- Quail: cute. but prefer peacock

R
- Reason to cry: losing.
- Reality T.V.: hmm hahaha
- Radio Station: next
- Roll your tongue in a circle?: no
- Ring size: dk

S
- Sushi: not really
- Skipped school: Yes.
- Slept outside: Yes.
- Smoke?: no
- Skinny dipped?: No.
- Shower daily?: No. hihi
- Sing well?: not really
- Sing in the Shower?: never
- Swear?: With most every breath.
- Strawberries/Blueberries: Strawberries.

T
- Time for bed: 12am or more
- Thunderstorms: Yes, please.

U
- Unpredictable: All the time.


V
- Vacation spot: I don’t have one X(

W
- Weakness: my ego
- Wanted to be a model?: No. prefer photographer :D
- Where do we go when we die?: how do i know????!!
- Worst Weather?: so cold or so hot :P

X
- X-Rays: n'er
- Ex’s: skip :P

Y
- Year it is now: 2009
- Yellow: submarine, yellow submarine. hahaha

Z
- Zoo animal: zebras

(I found this survey a couple of days ago, I cut and pasted it and now I can’t remember where I saw it. Sorry, original poster.)

kampanye capres ala marga

yayaya.
gw emang punya sejuta minat dan cita cita. tau apa cita2 terbaru gw?

PRESIDEN, coy.

asik bgt ga sih gw? brasa bisa mimpin sejuta umat aja. mimpin diri gw sendiri aja gw rasa belum becus.
but so what?

namanya juga cita2. gw punya misi, ok gw cuma penasaran, gimana rasanya mimpin nih negara, ngolah nih negara, ngurusin nih negara.
gw pengen mimpin pake cara gw.

talk less do more.
dan tentunya gw ini ga ribet2 yang penting semua seneng.

kenapa gw pengen jadi presiden?
simply. just because i think everyone could be president. dan kenapaaa mesti orang yang berdasi dan makan pendidikan setinggi-tinggi langit doang yang bisa menduduki kursi itu cuma buat merintah2 dan ngurusin.

ya kan? belum tentu makan bangku sekolah ampe tinggi2 bgt jadi jaminan lo bisa bikin nih negara makmur.
malah menurut gw, orang yang harusnya mimpin nih negara, bukan cuma dari segi pendidikan doang yang mesti diperhatiin, tapi juga dari pengalaman hidupnya dan cara pandangnya juga, hatinya.

oke mungkin gw terlalu cilik buat ngurus nih indonesia. tapi ayolah, semua orang berhak bukan?
gw pengen deh semua orang dapet 1 kesempatan buat mimpin nih negara 1 hari aja.

iya sih berantakan emang ntr jadinya. tapi tapi tidak bisakah menemukan pemimpin dari kalangan bawah? kalangan kita. bukan yang dari sono-sono aja. bosen gw, asli.

yah, gw dah 17. KTP (finally) dah dapet. tapi gw males milih jujur.
iya gw tau suara gw berpengaruh bgt tapi buat apa kalo gw ga tau apa2 tentang mereka. gw ga kenal mereka. gw cuma dapet janji2 mereka. gw cuma diiming2i.

buat apaa? gw bukan anti politik tapi.. gw cukup idealisme.

seengaknya, gw pengan nyariin indonesia presiden yang bener (eits gw ga blg mereka2 kandidat kita ga bener lho)
gw juga ga ngerasa sok bener kok. gw tau nih negara bakal cacat abis kalo gw yang mimpin.

seenggaknya.. (balik lagi) gw bisa mewawancarai para kandidat tsb.
PGN BGT!!
ga tau kenapa gw suka nanya2 ke orang ttg ini itu. yah istilahnya mewawancarai.

gw pengan nanya ke mereka, apa sih alasan lo pada jadi presiden? ga mumet apa lo pada ngurusin nih negara? apa aja yang lo punya buat bagusin nih negara?

lo yakin lo bisa? lo tau ga kayak apa sebenernya indonesia itu? lo tau ga kayak apa sengsaranya kita gara2 naik turunnya harga? lo tau ga gimana rasnya bersusah payah? lo tau ga gimana rasanya perjuangan?

lo yakin bisa tidur tiap malem kalo lo jadi presiden? gimana cara lo ngatasin itu semua?

hmmm. seandainya bokap gw jadi capres. ga bakal gw ijinin.
gw tau bokap gw gmn dan kalo sampe dy jadi capres apalagi sampe kepilih. amit amit deh. lo rasain aja semua.
gw lebih setuju nyokap gw jadi presiden wahahaha.

kalo gw punya satu orang buat dicalonin jadi presiden yah tentunya itu gw. kalo ga, ya nyokap gw :p
eits ini bukan nepotisme ato apa. tapi karena gw dah kenal nyokap gw dari gw pertama melek sampe segede gini. gw tau dy gmn. and i adore her.

okok. kandidat ketiga, pak narjo. guru kwn gw. haha gatau kenapa gw rasa dy punya karisma jadi presiden. pembawaanya santai. kalem tapi pasti. dia kayak tau semua gitu deh semua semua tentang politik, dan tentunya, ganteng coy hhahaha.

kandidat keempat, hmmm. siapa aja deh yang bisa bikin indonesia jauh jauh lebih baik. i support you. i envy you :)

enneagram, 9 tipe kepribadian manusia. and i got ..

PENGAMAT (yeah, that's so me)

Memiliki suatu kebutuhan akan pengetahuan, dan adalah pribadi yang introver, penuh rasa ingin tahu, analitis dan berwawasan. Mengandalkan kemampuannya sendiri dan menemukan rasa aman dalam pengetahuan.

Keunggulan : analitis, berpendirian teguh, sensitif, bijaksana, objektif, mudah memahami, dan mandiri.

Kejelekan : sok pintar, kikir, keras kepala, menjauhkan diri, suka mengkritik orang lain, mudah menyerah, dan sering bertentangan dengan orang lain.

Cara bergaul dengan saya : Mandirilah. Jangan maunya menempel terus. Bicaralah secara langsung dan ringkas. Saya butuh waktu sendirian untuk mengatur perasaan dan pikiran saya. Ingatlah, jika saya kelihatannya jauh, tidak mau mendekatkan diri atau sombong, itu "bisa" berarti bahwa saya sedang merasa tidak nyaman. Buatlah agar saya merasa diterima, tapi jangan terlalu menggebu, jika demikian, saya mungkin meragukan ketulusanmu. Jika saya menjadi jengkel karena harus mengulang sesuatu, itu mugnkin karena saya terlalu berusaha keras mengeluarkan pikiran saya pada kesempatan pertama. Jangan mendekati saya dengan sikap yang berisik. - Bantu saya menghindari hal yang tidak saya sukai : pesta besar, musik orang lain yang hingar bingar, emosi yang melelahkan, dan pelanggaran terhadap privasi saya.

comment :yah sedikitnya 75% bener lah. keras kepala bgt gw. daaan gw benci orang berisik. jauh2 dari gw lu kalo bacot hahha.

corection : gw suka kok pesta dan musik orang lain tp kalo itu dah terlalu hingar bingar bgt bgt mungkin gw akan menjauh sedikit ke tepi haha

question : katanya orang tuh beda2 tapi kenapa dari bejuta2 orang yang ada di dunia, bisa dikelompokan dengan 9 tipe saja? harusnya akan banyaaaaaak sekali tipe manusia doang? kan tiap orang beda2, hmmmmenneagram,

Wednesday, 3 June 2009

notes : ga perlu dibaca. gw cuma cukup muak sama apa yang gw rasakn belakangan ini. dan berusaha mencari jalan keluar.

I'm not kinda girl who can tell her feeling easily.

and now, I'll tell y'all :

I HATE YOU. I HATE MY BRO. I HATE HOW HE ACT LIKE THE-SWEETEST-BOY
I HATE HOW HE ANNOYED ME WITH ALL HIS STUPID QUESTION I HATE HOW HE TEASED ME I HATE HOW HE SOUNDS LIKE, ARGH!!

AND I HATE HOW COME HE BECAME SO DAMN BLIND AND EASILY DUMP ME
HOW HE IGNORE ME ND PRETEND NOTHING WAS HAPPENED AND LET ME HERE MOANING , LIKE EVERY NIGHT, I DREAMT OF HIM.
HOW SICK I AM OF THIS GODEMIT FEELING. AND I HATE HOW MUCH I LOVE HIM x(

dan gw benci orang orang yang dengan sok taunya menilai gw seenaknya dan sok taunya menerka nerka apa yang terjadi sama gw dan dengan sok taunya juga , seakan akan mereka tau segala sesuatu yang terjadi sama gw dan dengan sok taunya mencoba mencari tau tentang apa yang terjadi sama gw.
screw you ppl. get a life!!

i love this book. i have one and days to days the pages turns into yellow.
the story doesnt incredible yet amazing so much. no adventure. no fantasy. no horor or some kind dramatic.
but it has something that makes me in love so much

hmm i just love the innocence of her.

Monday, 1 June 2009

my currently wish list :

  1. NAIK KELAAASS *crossing fingers* i had a bad score on my math and geo, goddamit. it's important subject to deem the final result!
  2. macbook. yeah..
  3. job. dream job. watev! i need to do something conductive.
  4. MY OFFICIALLY IDENTITY CARD! damn how long it takes ha?! my card would make everything easier i guess when i have a officially card to convince my not-so-17-yet-face
  5. iPhone. currently in love with him.
  6. CAKE IN THE CUP AKA CUPCAKEESSS
  7. tiramisuu
  8. cheese cake

i think its enough. say it out loud, AMEEN! *FINGERS CROSSED*

meredith all the time.


i love Grey's Anatomy and fyi, i've tried all quizzes about Grey's Anatomy character on facebook (yes maybe some of you think i have nothing to do but killing my time in front of my-sensitive-computer. oh it's a yes.how great my life, having so much time to fill all quizess on facebook) and those have same results.
im Meredith. weew.
it was like 5 times i tried the different quizzes and it has same result.
oh yeah, i got Derek once.

what it means? am i so Meredith?
or am i so Meredith-Derek-lovelife ha?

what kind of mask do ya wear?


i dont why. i love it. haha