you must have moment when you feel so sad, down, in sorrow, miserable at once. feel like dying but you still craving for lights. where you wrote so many nasty lovey dovey things in your tweets, notes, blog, wherever. where you stalk him/her too much it makes you sick. when you think of him/her too much at night and end up with tears on your pillow. where you found your love songs (pr any songs that represent your lovelife so much) and feels like burying yourself at that time. where all the things you think about is just him/her. and feel so stupid about it. but you keep doing it.
well, ive been there. you can check my older archive. i feel like.. he-he-he-i-am-so-stupid-and-pathetic-that-time.
well, everybody must be lost to be saved, right?
i think i havent told this to you. about how far i am gone when i am "galau".
that was the hardest time in my life. that was the first. the deepest. but i enjoy it. i mean, it wouldnt be feel so much hurt if i didnt feel so much happines before, no? i must be so happy that time. so i am okay. i enjoy it. i enjoy every second of my pain. bcs i believe eveything is temporary. so does my pain.
ehem, back to topic, by the way. during my galau time. i did something stupid. like people do.
i went to BSD (yes, only that far. shame on me) during raining. with no coat covering me. with my galau-friend, Vina. i cried in the middle of the rain, i screamed. why he is so mean. (now i am ashamed) how could he do this to me. does he know i am suffering. we both screaming and wondering.
well, doesnt mean to dramatize it, but i didnt plan to go when it rain. i just planned to go to BSD to find some food then suddenly heavy rain and thunder hit my town. i didnt care, so did her. so we decided to go. at night.
then, i almost cried every night. every time i heard certain songs.
but now, i cant say that i am not galau anymore. but i am just saying, at least im letting go. bcs i held nothing before.
im just thinking, galau is the part of our life. that will deliver us to some happiness. bcs if you're not galau, you wont realize what happiness truly feels like.